Popeye's Revenge (2025)

 Subject:  Popeye's Revenge

Year:  2025

Director:  William Stead

Run Time:  78 mins or so

Cast:  Emily Mogilner, Connor Powles, Steven Murphy

Genre:  killer Popeyes

Skin:  twerkin' in a mine and some hot tub titties

Blood:  great gore - a lot more than I was expecting

Rating:  2.5/5

The Story:

Born deformed in a flashback, comic book scene, Popeye is a monster.  He's teased by children at school, forced to wear a silly outfit, can't get a date for prom, and eventually has to be locked in his parent's basement after he snaps.  While down there he meets a friend, Olive Oil I guess, through a door in the basement and they exchange drawings.  I guess this is important.

Anyway, the townsfolk pull a Freddy Krueger and light the house ablaze, killing Popeye's family and friend because the kid he attacked died.  I think.  Popeye escapes and takes off into the nearby woods, sinking into a lake as we fade to the current day.

Pretty good backstory for a slasher character.  Enough for me, anyway.

It's now 2025 and a group of young people are nearby, just waiting to get killed as they rebuild the old Popeye house into England's newest and best haunted house attraction.  You can probably guess where things go from there.

Review:

I have to admit, I'm kind of enjoying this new influx of wannabe grindhouse and slasher flicks that has exploded in the UK since so many of these old children's characters have become free use.  They aren't great, most of them not even close, but at least the creators (and the ITN company, which seems to be behind a lot of them) seem to be  trying to do things the right way.  Simple enough stories (most ripped off from early American slashers), blood, tits, and a load of dummies too stupid to stay the hell away from Crystal Lake...er, wherever it is this takes place.

You'll forgive me for being confused, they did use the Friday the 13th font for their title screen.  Plus the whole "he drowned in the lake fifteen year ago" thing...

Fortunately for Popeye's Revenge, the creators take more than just title card and story inspiration from ol' Jason.  We get some awesome kills - including a gnarly severed arm impaling, a ripped out spine, an anchor to the dick, and a ripped off head (though last three all on the same dude).  There's even an ode to Fulci with a slow splinter to the eye.  The fog effect that follows the monster around is also cool, and gives him more of a supernatural feel than he'd otherwise have.

Things aren't all spinach though, and there's as much bad as good in this one.  The lack of budget definitely shows in some of the kills and the story doesn't really break any new ground.  There's also the problem that the Popeye character doesn't really lend itself to horror that well.  Yeah, I get that he's your gimmick and the name is being used because it is so out of place in a horror movie, but in practice it just isn't that good.  They also show the character within the first ten minutes and that pretty much kills the novelty.

Popeye's Revenge is still a strong outing for director William Stead though.  We have some decent looking girls, a little skin, a little blood, a few good gore effects, and Steven Murphy doing his damndest to make Popeye a member of the Voorhees clan.  An easy 2.5 out of 5.  Not any kind of a classic, but a step in the right direction for old school slasher flick.